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Monday, October 04, 2004
haiz.. here i am.. back to square again.. sitting here so lonely in front of my computer waiting sadly for my dearest dar dar to go home and call me.. but juz msg him a few minutes ago and he's stil outside.. guess he won't be going home so early today.. but cannot blame him too.. who doesn't want to enjoy them? not like me, stay at home and rot.. sad pathetic.. sometime i juz hope that life can be enriched more fun and interesting programmes..
sad at heart now, i wish someone would call me.. i'm so bored and dead.. not reali feeling well today.. haiz.. sitting here typing, i can feel my stupid stomach so pain.. sobb sobb.. sometime i wonder why gals suffer so much and whereas boys dun.. maybe they do but i still thinks that gals are more at the losing end.. cos everytime when things happen, gals are always the one who took the blame or suffer.. it's not fair.. haiz.. anyway, dun bother too much about what i say.. i'm rather moody.. sad.. unwell.. and sitting around feeling sorry for myself..
my dearie.. miss u alot.. *sad sad* tears rolling down my cheeks.. *sobb sobb* haiz.. he just called me.. say he was eating so i asked him to carry on.. cos i dun wan him to get choke while talking to me and eating.. hmz.. as for me, i haven eaten.. no appetite.. juz now drank some milk and it ended up in the toilet bowl flushed down the pipe and into... i dunno where.. never for me to care anyway.. hmz.. dearie asked me whether i wan to meet him tml anot.. of cos i wan to.. but school ends at 1.30pm.. the earliest time i can reach home is 2.15pm and by the time i get out of my stupid house, i'm not sure what time is it already.. so have to think about it.. hmz.. juz now hear his voice so glad.. but dunno why juz cannot smile.. maybe reali not feeling good today.. fainting soon i guess.. *oops* not suppose to say that..
hmz.. although he dun reali have time to accompany me, he's someone veri sweet and loving.. i think that with him around, life would be better but it would also get worse.. to me, love is like a game.. when one has finish using his or her credits, there is no way u can continue when it's over unless someone is willing to lend u some of it.. but what u borrow have to be returned..
someone once say, "You learn to love, not by finding a perfect person,but by learning to see an imperfect person perfectly." and somehow, i love my dear not bcos of who he is but who i am when i'm with him.. no one is perfect and no one will ever be..
having someone to love u is a blessing whereas loving someone is a torture.. but true love is eternal so cherish lvoe when u got the chance as once it left u, there is no way to get it back.. so dun let love be onli a memory.. but let it be reality.. Great love is when u shed tears and stil care for him.. it's when he ignores u and u still longed for him.. and it's when he begins to love another and yet u still smile and say ya happy for him..
i think i'm writing too much already.. but what am i going to do now? what more can i do? miss him.. later he kept on sneezing how? hmz.. think i''ll juz stop here.. stomach reali so pain.. hardly able to take it anymore..
("V")ThE gReAsTeSt ThInG u'LL eVeR LeArNt Is JuZ tO lOvE aNd Be LoVeD iN rEtUrN("V")
Love TaNgTaNg
A Never Ending Love