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Tuesday, May 19, 2009
I am so tired now.. Worn down by the past events.. While i was away in Kl for the weekend, something kinda happen and i realized it when i came back to Singapore.. I am not gonna say what exactly happen.. and the person who is also a part of the incident should know what i am refering to..
Anyway, i am not sure of what to say.. a cloud of anger and disappoint still stir around me.. i am not sure how should i face you now and vice versa.. i am not blaming that it is totally you fault.. like i have said to you earlier.. maybe it is me who think naive that there is trust and respect threfore you would not do it.. but guess i was wrong.. curiousity always kills the cat.. and in this situation, you are left hanging there waiting when to die.. or maybe u should just reach for the string and cut it so that you wouldn't be dangling there..
i do admit that these few years, i have been drifting in and out of your life.. but at times, do you seriously think that i want it to happen? u say u wanna share whatever i was going through but on the other hand, do you truly understand? if you do not then wouldn't there be more frustration and misunderstanding?
i am really lost for words now.. it hardly happens..
lastly before i stop blogging here i wanna let you know that i was so angry because it is not the first time such a thing happen.. u know how pissed i was before and i am even more piss now.. i don't like people poking their nose into my business.. if you truly wanna know anything, ask.. is it that hard? we should laern from our mistakes and therefore it is why we learn history.. but i guess this time, you did not remember the lesson that was taught before..
i truly am not sure how long would it take me to stop being mad at you this time because i initially believed u.. i am sorry too for being so grouchy the past few days.. i don't know what to say now.. speechless..
i am lost and i cannot find my way..
blinded by darkness, anger and frustration,
i threw my guiding stick away ..
it guided me wrongly and therefore i was met with obstacles..
life never seems to be smooth sailing..
i then thought.. will i ever getmy guidence back?
it didn't matter now..
bcos with or without it, i am already lost..
if it truly belongs to me, it will eventually comes back..
to the rightful owner..
now i need to find the way out of the darkness alone..
i need to be strong..
i will survive..
Love Candida
A Never Ending Love